It's Christmas Eve...

...and all is calm....downright sedate in fact.

But years ago, 'twasn't so...

...five sons made sure of that.

We trimmed the tree...

...while carols played, admiring Christmas lights.

We read about St. Nick's big trip...

...around the world that night.

We marveled as three Christmas Ghosts...

...gave Scrooge an awful fright.

And cheered his reformation,

O what a joyful sight!

Then off to bed if not to sleep...

...not much rest sublime.

I'd do it all again tonight...

...could I travel back in time.

But time and tide, so Chaucer wrote,

...for no man tarry they.

And now my sons, once little boys,

...have grown and moved away.

It's true this night has changed a bit,

...much calmer than before.

But now - as then - we celebrate...

...the advent of our Lord.

In spite of a snow storm to kick off the week, there will be no white Christmas this year...

...temps in the 50's have returned and there's nary a snowflake in sight.

kinda going the wrong direction

That’s fine with me...I'll swing my hickories for a while, then most of our children (and their kids) will gather with us over the next couple of days.

Lord willing, a good time will be had by all.

One that won't be with us...

Ryan, 1981 - 2021

...is my 2nd son Ryan;  he celebrates Christmas in heaven now.

I do so look forward to seeing him again, but for the time being that remains a pleasure denied.

Until the day of our happy reunion I soldier on, giving thanks to God in heaven for the gift of His Son and the chance to share another Christmas with loved ones here on earth.

I hope you do, too.

As Cole Porter opined musically so many years ago:

"You do

that voodoo

that you do

so's time to

23 Skidoo!"

(it's possible he may have tweaked the lyrics a bit on the <final version>)...

yes, he does have a water dish

"apple pie without some cheese is like a kiss without a squeeze"

apparently their mother never taught them it's impolite to stare

lowered the flag due to 40mph wind gusts, but Santa and his team weathered the storm without issue

As we close up shop at the Atomic Monster Cafe on this Christmas Eve, we leave you with our Christmas greetings:

Merry Christmas, mcm fans...

This Is That...

...<time of the year>...or so sang Jack Jones about Christmas on this 1967 vinyl LP from Firestone.

Great album and great memories from my childhood, and of course I spin it regularly this time of year.

No, it's not the same one my folks had back then, but in keeping with the spirit of the boomer generation - 

"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I bought all my toys back on ebay."

(with apologies to the Apostle Paul, see I Corinthians 13:11,12 for the actual quote)

- I did just that: found it on ebay a few years ago and have been enjoying it -

- at Christmas (again) ever since.

And now, as a tip o' the hat to the inexorable forward march of time, let's do this:

One Week To Go...

...and all through the land...people clamored to know, "O, when will it end?!"

"The answer's contained in the statement, my dear,

"Just 7 more days 'til Christmas is here!"

So hurry and watch those shows on TV!

The halls all need decking; you must trim the tree!

But somewhere amidst all the sparkle and shine,

The tumult and chaos that's stealing your time,

Take a moment or two for calm meditation;

Remember the Reason for this celebration.

The lights and the glitter are all well and good,

The ornaments, presents, songs and the food...

But when you consider the Grand Scheme of things,

They're really just heralds for our Newborn King.

So sing and be merry with those that you love,

But always remember God's gift from above.

With shepherds and Angels we echo it still:

"Glory to God, peace on earth and good will."

Our unseasonably mild weather continues, so you know what that means...

...I'm still whacking wiffle golf balls in my back yard, struggling to apply some of Moe Norman's "hit 'em straight" magic to my wayward swing.

And while it is a struggle, there are occasional glimpses of progress:

a recent session, practicing with my brassie...

...yielded this tight grouping of 4 in a row

Of course, I could include some pics where the little white balls are so far apart they don't even fit in a wide angle lens shot.

I'm never going to be a great golfer - you can't put in what God left out - but I can be a better golfer than I am now...it just takes patience and practice.

Lots and lots of practice.

We soldier on.

Widdout foida adieu, 23 skidoo...

he actually sleeps in that position...go figger

Karen decorated my office, kickin' it Peanuts style

the aforementioned Jack Jones...he also sang The Love Boat theme in 1977

love those eyes

finally got to visit (a picture of) Mt. Rushmore...thrillin'

And that, Kind Reader, brings to a close another excitin' session of blexcellence.

We here at the Atomic Monster Cafe trust your experience was one filled with both delight and wonder, but if not, don't blame us.

We're so delightful, we wonder how anyone could be better, and thus we've concluded "they could not".

And we'll fight any man who says different!

"I can't sing and I can't dance, but I can beat any S.O.B. in the house!"
- Jack Dempsey, heavyweight champion

later, mcm fans...

This Is Where I Fake Left...

courtesy of the Film Photography Project

...with this cute li'l holiday ornament...and when you're not looking, go right with the annual presentation of:

'Twas 2 weeks before Christmas...

 ...and every mouse...had fled frozen fields for the warmth of my house.

My wife found their droppings and said, "I'm not pleased, to think that these varmints are taking their ease...

"...inside my warm dwelling; this outrage won't stand!

What will you do?"  Then I raised my hand:

"These mice, they are finished!  Kaput and Kersplatz!

No way they'll survive 'cause we have 4 cats!"

Then we beheld our mog desperados...

Kitty...

...and Smokey...

...and Buddy El Gato.

"Well don't forget Loki," admonished my wife.

"But counting on him?  Ha!  Don't bet your life."

Disciples of Garfield were these lazy creatures,

with eating and sleeping their dominant features.

Ignoring those four hebetudinous chaps,

I scrounged all around 'til I found an old trap.

And later that evening 'ere mice came a-creeping,

I set the cruel deadfall then got busy sleeping.

So early next 'morn, at dawn's early light,

I sprang from my bed to find what I might.

But what did my wondering eyes finally see,

but a clean, empty trap and a note left for me:

"Thanks for the cheese, but what would be better,

instead of old muenster, could we have fresh cheddar?"

"And what's with this platter?" my mousy pals asked.

"We might have been killed if we hadn't been fast!"

'Twas then that I thought of the great Robert Burns

and his famous lament to a mouse that he turned,

Out of warm hearth and home as he plowed in his field.

Did I want to partake in his life time of guilt?

The best laid plans, it is easy to see,

Gang aft agley and I think you'll agree,

There was nothing to do but give them their cheddar.

After all, 'twas Christmas, and what could be better,

Than showing the love God has for His swarm,

by letting them stay inside where it's warm?

So out went the trap, but the mice?  Man alive!

We're quite overrun but I guess we'll survive.

And lifting a quote from St. Nick's yearly flight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a Good Night!"

original artwork by Diane Dempsey

Oh quit whining, you big baby.

It’s like ripping off a band aid...stings for a minute and then you're fine.

Even though we're just 2 weeks from the big day, you can't tell it from the weather:

at least we got rid of the leaves

50+ degrees is not what we expect here in mid-December.

If you're a winter sports person...

...this ain't good.

But in my case it's giving me a chance to...

Well, maybe not exactly "play" hickory - that's months away, unfortunately - but I have been swatting wiffle golf balls in my backyard with my slimmed down playset.

Been experimenting with some Moe Norman principles, with varying degrees of success.

His "feet planted, reduced hip rotation" feels awkward, but I'm working on making that change.

Two things that feel much more natural are his palm grip and shortened backswing.

The palm grip gives better control of the club face.

And while it may look odd...

MN began with the club head a foot away from the ball

...the shortened back swing addresses what Sam Snead called the most dangerous part: the first 12 inches.

When you start wrong, you finish wrong.

Eliminating the first foot mitigates that, and so far it seems to be working for me.

However you get there, the point of everything we do with a golf club is about one and only one thing:  the moment of impact, when club meets ball.

That's what determines if your ball ends up in the fairway, or hopelessly lost…

...somewhere in the hinterlands.

MN was a golf swing savant; he spent a lifetime perfecting it.  It's not possible to cherry pick his form and achieve his results.  

But I don't expect to; if applying some of his principles helps me keep the little white ball in the fairway more consistently, I'll be a happy man.

Either way it's been an unexpected pleasure, swinging my hickories in mid-December.

An early present from Santa, I guess.

Now Kind Reader, farewell and adieu;

or in Flatiron parlance, 23 skidoo!

enjoyed dinner with friends visiting from Alaska

beautiful view of the lake shore area

recent sustained high winds with gusts over 50 mph...

...caused a little problem for Santa and his reindeer...

...but after some antler repairs and gyroscopic recalibration, Christmas is saved:  they're back in business and cleared for takeoff on runway 36

spinning some new Christmas vinyl...Satchmo...

...and Ol' Blue Eyes

from 1956, a beautiful couple "loved for gentleness".  the equivalent of these types of ads today are for drugs; they show happy people enjoying life while the narrator reads an ominous list of side effects that can maim or kill you, then finishes with, "ask your doctor if hoc occideret is right for you".

Remember, smart Christmas shoppers start early, which means the rest of us are dumb.

But not to worry, there's still plenty of time to panic.

later, mcm fans...