He Is Not Here...

 

...for He is risen, as He said.  Come, see the place where the Lord lay.

    - Matthew 28:6

"The Greatest Man in history had no servants, yet they called him Master;

"No degree, yet they called him Teacher;

"No medicines, yet they called him Healer.

"He had no army, won no military battles and committed no crime...

"...yet kings feared Him, He conquered the world and they crucified Him between two thieves.

"He was buried in a tomb, but death could not hold Him;

"He rose again and lives today.

"His name is Jesus;

"Do you know Him?"

Happy Resurrection Day, y'all...hope you celebrated the most important event in human history with those you love.

It's been slow coming, but Spring is gradually showing signs of creeping across the countryside.

We now have some lovely purple flowers covering parts of our front lawn...

...and bright yellow daffodils sprouting in our back yard...

...along with gorgeous red bulbs proliferating in...

...uh...no, wait a minute; I'm wrong.

Those are just some old cherry tomatoes Karen asked me to throw in the woods, but I didn't quite get there.

Well, anyway; the point is Spring has sprung 'round these parts and that's a good thing.

In casual conversation I recently remarked to Karen,

"One of my favorite calendrical expeditions is the exhilarating, annual journey to which all of us acquiesce as we venture across that immutable boundary between the meteorologically barren wilds of March to the lushly vernal expanse of April!"

She replied, Say what??

Translation:

I'm happy when April finally arrives.

To which simplified sentiment everyone should lend a hearty "Amen".

Here in the northland we do have improving weather prospects; it's normally mid to late April when I'm finally able to get back on the links...

...often with <less than spectacular results>.

But there's another aspect to that boundary crossing that used to be a much bigger deal back in the day than it seems to be nowadays:

April 1st, aka April Fools Day, and especially the "mass market" variety.

One of my favorite April Fools pranks came courtesy of the traditionally stuffy BBC on April 1st, 1957:

the annual spaghetti harvest in Ticino, Switzerland

<Watch It Here>

No doubt their reputation for stiff upper lips contributed to the widespread acceptance of this farcical two and a half minute mockumentary on harvesting spaghetti.

However, for my money the all-time best April Fools Day prank was perpetrated in 1985 by the once great/now worthless woke trash sports mag, Sports Illustrated:

that's 6'4" jr. high art teacher Joe Berton in 1985, friend of SI photog Lane Stewart, posing as Finch.  Berton wears a size 14 shoe. 

You can <read about it here> but the gist was the NY Mets had discovered a reclusive, free spirited rookie prospect named Hayden Siddhartha Finch who practiced yoga, played the french horn, had a pitching style that bore an alarming resemblance to <Goofy>, but could throw a 168 mph fastball.

George Plimpton was the author, which should have been a dead giveaway (check out <Paper Lion>), along with the brief paragraph on the very 1st page:

He's A Pitcher, Part Yogi And Part Recluse.  Impressively Liberated From Our Opulent Lifestyle, Sidd's Deciding About Yoga - And his Future In Baseball.

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY A(h) FIB

Widely believed - photographs in the article included actual Mets players and coaches (who were in on the gag) hanging out with "Sidd" - the issue created a firestorm of interest and activity, as both jubilant Mets fans and dispirited opponents scrambled to learn more about this freak of nature.

To SI's credit, they played it close to the vest, admitting nothing publicly, and let the furor ensue.

Then a week later in their next edition, they published a brief statement that Sidd Finch had retired from baseball; a week after that they admitted in print the whole thing was a hoax.

Ah, the good ol' days, before humor succumbed to the suffocating ideology of woke.

There hasn't been anything that comes close to either the BBC's or the former SI's pranks in years, for good reason.

With hordes of AWFL*s on high alert...

...searching high and low for new and exciting ways to be offended, most folks have simply opted to seek cover and stay out of the line of fire.

* AWFL - Affluent White Female Liberal

Speaking of retirement, let's put this edition of the AMC to bed with a big fat helping of 23 Skidoo:

like most problems...

...if you don't tend to them post haste...

...they tend to spread

#4 son and his wife (not to be confused with Ward and June Cleaver) gave us a very cool Christmas gift - a "Frameo" - which I finally got around to setting up.  it auto-downloads pics they specify so we get a constant slide show of them and their kids...super cool idea.

a few Easter and Spring motif decorations have cropped up lately...

...lightening the mood a bit...

...as we finally exit winter...

...and happily embrace the new season.

not mine, though I'm told there's a striking resemblance...just something our little eyes spied at the eye doctor's recently

dinnertime at the ok corral

and finally, the long awaited return of enjoying a Parodi Kings cigar from my vantage point in the command center

Judging by this Easter morning's cold and windy weather, April is stealing a page from March's playbook and has "come in like a lion".

No doubt 4 weeks from now we'll have warmed up nicely and April will "go out like a lamb".

It's interesting that Jesus is called both the "Lion" and the "Lamb".

You can trace this seemingly contradictory imagery from the beginning of the Bible to the end.

In Geneses 49:9,10 Jacob blesses his son Judah (from whom Jesus descended) as a lion that will retain the scepter.

In Revelation 5:5-9 the Lion of Judah opens the scroll of God's judgment and is worshipped as the Lamb of God who was slain to redeem us by His blood.

Today - Easter - we celebrate Jesus as the Lamb of God, our Redeemer and Perfect Sacrifice, who died on Calvary's cross for our sins and then rose to life again on that very first Easter Sunday.

But He's also the Lion of Judah who will one day return in glory and administer God's judgment on an unbelieving and unrepentant world.

By the grace of God, we all get to choose where we'll spend eternity; it's part of God's plan for "free will".

My advice?

Trust the Lamb of God at the foot of the cross in faith and enjoy the glories of heaven.

Otherwise you'll face the Lion of Judah in judgment, and you do not want to end up in the smoking section.

later, mcm fans...

And Now, The Biggest...

 

...Of The Year Award goes to...

...the actor who flushed his career and legacy down the toi-toi with one monumentally stupid - not to mention criminal - slap, Will Smith.

How arrogant and out of touch with reality must you be to physically assault someone who's half your size - during a world wide broadcast, no less - for telling a lame joke at which you laughed?

Smith laughing at Rock's joke, just before Jada got his mind right

And that, boys and girls, is how you piss away 30 years of hard work with an idiotic display of faux chivalry.

How was he not handcuffed and perp walked out of the building?

Guaranteed you or I would have been, even before the echoes of The Slap finished reverberating through Dolby Theatre.

Ah, Celebrity!  Privilege be thy name.

That foul stench you smell is the smoldering remains of Will Smith's once shiny "good guy" image.

Chris Rock, on the other hand, proved himself to be a true professional with an iron jaw and nerves of steel.

If you're keeping score, that's...

This is NOT how I hoped to begin April...

...but it is after all, April Fool's Day.

As usual...

kinda looks like a frozen jabba the hutt

...Ol' Man Winter is overstaying his welcome.

Here's a website you should check out:

Retro Ghost Town

He's got some very cool mcm items and is building an ambitious - well, Retro Ghost Town.

You've got to see it to believe it.

Enjoy.

In this week's bowling update...

...I continued with my "1 out of 9" forays into near competence, with the rest being my usual.

Progress is slow, my form is awkward, timing is off and open frames are a problem.

As often as not I'm shaking my head wondering what the heck just happened.

In spite of all that, I'm learning a little bit, getting some exercise and having a good time in the process.

See you at the lanes...

Ok, I admit it...it's a slow news day, but we're almost done here.

Just shuffle on through the Parting Shots Department, keep your hands where we can see them, and then you're free to go...

believe it or not:  today, 12 hours later

cool mcm antique shop...they've even got some cherner chairs for sale...

...yeah, those.

turkey confab at the feeder

so take that

I want this...or at least I want to vacation there

Thus endeth the blog entry, fellow midcentury modernians.

On your way out the door, here's some food for thought....and since you made it to the bonus round, we'll throw in this added benefit:

If you can comprehend this in its proper context and truly grasp the import of The Preacher's words, you will fully understand Will Smith's problem...and mine...and yours:

"He hath made everything beautiful in his time: also he hath set eternity in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end."

    - Ecclesiastes 3:11

(hint: click and scroll down to verse 11)

later, mcm fans...